*We see clips from Superstars, like the Caden-Hylander confrontation, Vader and Gambler beaten up by HHH and King Kong Bundy, and The Harris Brothers challenging The Quebecers to a Tag Team Title match on Havoc*
==========
*Backstage, a limo pulls up. The Gambler gets out, wearing a pimp hat and leopard coat. He seems to be strutting around*
GAMBLER: Oh yeah baby, The Gambler is in town! Look out Triple H, your about to roll a snake eyes!
==========
*Usual Havoc intro occurs*
==========
*The crowd of about 2,500 scream their heads off as Jon Sullivan and Trent Taylor welcome the home audience to the second edition of USWA Havoc. They talk about the goings on of the USWA and plug the HUGE main event of The Gambler and Triple H for the Heavyweight Title!*
==========
Number-One-Contenders-Triangle Match:
Prince Iaukea defeated Funaki and Twiggy Ramirez when Iaukea pinned Funaki with the Paisley Park in 0:11:19.
Rating: ** 1/4
OBSERVATIONS: This match was to decide a number one contender to the USWA Light Heavyweight Title, the winner who will go on to Beach Blast to face Spike Dudley. All three men pulled out all the stops but it was Prince Iaukea who came out on top. So now we have our first signed match for Beach Blast: Dudley-Iaukea for the Light Heavyweight Championship!
==========
*Backstage, Triple H and King Kong Bundy enter the arena*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*Triple Hs music hits as he and King Kong Bundy come out to the ring. The crowd boos their heads off and some throw garbage, to which Bundy eats it?!? Whoah! They get into the ring and Triple H has a microphone*
TRIPLE H: Finally, after toiling around for a goddamn week, I get my shot at the USWA Heavyweight Championship against the biggest fluke champion in history THE GAMBLER! *crowd cheers* Shut up! Tonight, all you idiot fans will see what a true champion is when I beat that hairy, sorry, no excuse for a wrestler in the middle of the ring and flatten his face with the Pedigree! Now, Im sure all you people are wondering just why in the hell King Kong Bundy decided to join forces with me after what I did to him on Havoc. Well, Ill let the man speak for himself.
*Triple H hands the mic to Bundy*
BUNDY: Its a very simple thing people. Triple H reminds me of me when I was in my prime. Hungry. Angry. Powerful. I may not be what I once was, but dammit I am still strong. I am still hungry. I am still angry. And Im sure as hell powerful. After having the chair smashed into my face back on Havoc, I sat in my home and began to think. Would I want to be against Triple H? Hell no. I decided to join him and train him. Teach him the ways. Ric Flair has nothing on me, hes just some lucky punk! Together, me and Triple H will take over the USWA!
*Triple H gets the mic back*
TRIPLE H: Starting tonight, USWA becomes our territory!
*Triple H throws down the mic and they exit*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*When we come back from the break, Joe E. Legend is in the ring*
LEGEND: Hello there ladies and gentlemen. In case you have been living in a cave for the past few years, let me introduce myself: I am the only and only JOE E LEGEND!!! *crowd yells who?!?* Very funny, since you are an uneducated crowd, Ill let that slip. Tonight, I am here in the USWA for one reason: to prove myself! Since the USWA has restarted, I have gotten no air time. Well, forget the powers that be, I decided to get my own! I dont have a match tonight, but Im looking for someone to face in a special Legends Match. Get it? I made it up myself. Whos man enough to face me?
*The lights go out and the Goldberg theme hits. The crowd is NUTS and starts chanting Goldberg. Little flares go up as the lights come back on. Its GILLBERG?!? The crowd roars with laughter as he walks to the ring, making all these mannerisms like Goldberg. He heads to the ring and climbs in, tripping on the ropes. He swipes the mic from Legend, whos trying not to laugh*
GILLBERG: I just have one question for you Legend WHOS FIRST?!?
*Gillberg growls wussily and Legend grabs the mic*
LEGEND: (in between laughter) You want it, you got it!
*Bell rings, match is underway*
==========
[Legends Match]:
Gillberg pinned Joe E. Legend with the Jackhammer in 0:09:15.
Rating: -* 3/4
OBSERVATIONS: Legend basically had the advantage the whole time, but Gillberg all of a sudden popped out of nowhere with a weak spear followed by a Jackhammer for the UPSET VICTORY!
==========
*Gillberg rolls out of the ring and celebrates! Legend grabs a mic*
LEGEND: No, no, no, no, no! Gillberg, you lucky son of a bitch! You didnt beat me fair and square! You grabbed my tights! I want you on Superstars Gillberg in a rematch!
*Gillberg growls and yells you got it! as the crowd cheers*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*We see a rundown of the past few weeks and the Caden-Hylander feud*
==========
Caden pinned Jesse James Armstrong after a Frankensteiner from the top rope in
0:09:24.
Rating: **
OBSERVATIONS: This match was at the request of Armstrong, who was still pissed he was screwed out of his shot of the Southern Title on the first Havoc a week back. Armstrong took it to Caden and managed to hit the Pumphandle Slam but Caden got his foot on the ropes ensuring the match would go on. Armstrong was felled minutes later by a Frankensteiner off the top rope.
==========
*After the match, Caden hit a Cadenizer to an already hurt Armstrong. Caden then grabbed a mic*
CADEN: Hylander, I stay we stop all these petty going around. At Beach Blast, I want your ass in the ring! *crowd cheers* Lets hope you accept Hylander unless Alicia wont let you.
*Caden throws the mic down and walks off*
==========
*Backstage, Evan Hylander is in his locker room. He kicks the TV, which crashes to the ground*
HYLANDER: That son of a bitch wants me at Beach Blast hell have me! His ass is mine!
==========
Commercial Break
==========
The Quebecers defeated The Harris Brothers when P. Oulette pinned R. Harris
with the Cannonball in 0:13:53.
Rating: * 3/4
(The Quebecers won the USWA Tag Team Titles.)
OBSERVATIONS: Quite an interesting match. Both teams went back and forth. In the final minutes, Men on a Mission came out to try to stop The Quebecers from winning. But Mabel accidentally hit Ron Harris with a chair. Jacques kept Don Harris busy as Pierre ended up winning the match for his team as well as the belts!
==========
*The Quebecers quickly celebrate their win then high tail it out of there as Mabel and Mo rush in. Ron and Don Harris then attack Men on a Mission from behind, leaving them laying*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*Backstage, we have Joe Bob Briggs with The Gambler, whos still decked out on his designer threads*
BRIGGS: *trying to hold in sarcasm* Gambler, tonight you will go one on one with Triple H for the Heavyweight Title. This is a big night and it looked like your dressed for the occasion GOD YOU LOOK TERRIBLE!
GAMBLER: Hey man, these clothes cost me 500 bucks! I made a couple bets on Superstars and won a bunch so I decided to look good tonight. It is a big night. But whatever. As I proved to everyone by beating my good friend Vader, I am better than I seem. And tonight I will destroy Triple H. Let the dice roll baby! *Pause* New catchphrase. What do you think?
BRIGGS: No wonder no one else signed up for this job.
*Briggs walks off*
GAMBLER: What?!? It goes with the gimmick!
==========
Evan Hylander defeated Malice by disqualification in 0:12:38.
Rating: 3/4*
(Evan Hylander retained the USWA Southern Title.)
OBSERVATIONS: This is a debut of Malice and he took it to Hylander. But Caden came in to interfere and cause the DQ.
==========
*After the match, Caden continued the assault. But Hylander started to fight back. The two fought into the crowd before being separated by security*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
The Gambler pinned Hunter Hearst Helmsley with the Five Card Stud in 0:09:28.
Rating: *
(The Gambler retained the USWA Heavyweight Title.)
OBSERVATIONS: This match was insane! Triple H wasted no time getting on the offensive, jumping The Gambler even before the bell rang. The fight spilled to the outside, back into the ring, then back to the outside with Trips getting more offense than Gambler. Gambler started to fight back though and managed to hit a dropkick that sent Trips from the apron to the barricade. King Kong Bundy came out and tried to attack but Gambler managed to fight him off for awhile. Trips then hit the ref and the two went nuts on him. Trips then hit the Pedigree. The ref woke up. 1..2..GAMBLER KICKED OUT! Trips threw Gambler into the ref again and Bundy came back out. But this time, Gambler had backup. Big Van Vader ran to the ring and knocked Bundy to the outside unconscious. Vader then hit a DEVESTATING chair shot to Trips cranium. Gambler woke up and hit the Five Card Stud. 1...2...3! GAMBLER WON IT!
==========
*Vader pulls Gambler out of the ring and the two celebrate from the ramp as the show goes off the air. Triple H and Bundy stood there in awe and anger*
==========
©2003 Dogstar Productions
==========
*Backstage, a limo pulls up. The Gambler gets out, wearing a pimp hat and leopard coat. He seems to be strutting around*
GAMBLER: Oh yeah baby, The Gambler is in town! Look out Triple H, your about to roll a snake eyes!
==========
*Usual Havoc intro occurs*
==========
*The crowd of about 2,500 scream their heads off as Jon Sullivan and Trent Taylor welcome the home audience to the second edition of USWA Havoc. They talk about the goings on of the USWA and plug the HUGE main event of The Gambler and Triple H for the Heavyweight Title!*
==========
Number-One-Contenders-Triangle Match:
Prince Iaukea defeated Funaki and Twiggy Ramirez when Iaukea pinned Funaki with the Paisley Park in 0:11:19.
Rating: ** 1/4
OBSERVATIONS: This match was to decide a number one contender to the USWA Light Heavyweight Title, the winner who will go on to Beach Blast to face Spike Dudley. All three men pulled out all the stops but it was Prince Iaukea who came out on top. So now we have our first signed match for Beach Blast: Dudley-Iaukea for the Light Heavyweight Championship!
==========
*Backstage, Triple H and King Kong Bundy enter the arena*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*Triple Hs music hits as he and King Kong Bundy come out to the ring. The crowd boos their heads off and some throw garbage, to which Bundy eats it?!? Whoah! They get into the ring and Triple H has a microphone*
TRIPLE H: Finally, after toiling around for a goddamn week, I get my shot at the USWA Heavyweight Championship against the biggest fluke champion in history THE GAMBLER! *crowd cheers* Shut up! Tonight, all you idiot fans will see what a true champion is when I beat that hairy, sorry, no excuse for a wrestler in the middle of the ring and flatten his face with the Pedigree! Now, Im sure all you people are wondering just why in the hell King Kong Bundy decided to join forces with me after what I did to him on Havoc. Well, Ill let the man speak for himself.
*Triple H hands the mic to Bundy*
BUNDY: Its a very simple thing people. Triple H reminds me of me when I was in my prime. Hungry. Angry. Powerful. I may not be what I once was, but dammit I am still strong. I am still hungry. I am still angry. And Im sure as hell powerful. After having the chair smashed into my face back on Havoc, I sat in my home and began to think. Would I want to be against Triple H? Hell no. I decided to join him and train him. Teach him the ways. Ric Flair has nothing on me, hes just some lucky punk! Together, me and Triple H will take over the USWA!
*Triple H gets the mic back*
TRIPLE H: Starting tonight, USWA becomes our territory!
*Triple H throws down the mic and they exit*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*When we come back from the break, Joe E. Legend is in the ring*
LEGEND: Hello there ladies and gentlemen. In case you have been living in a cave for the past few years, let me introduce myself: I am the only and only JOE E LEGEND!!! *crowd yells who?!?* Very funny, since you are an uneducated crowd, Ill let that slip. Tonight, I am here in the USWA for one reason: to prove myself! Since the USWA has restarted, I have gotten no air time. Well, forget the powers that be, I decided to get my own! I dont have a match tonight, but Im looking for someone to face in a special Legends Match. Get it? I made it up myself. Whos man enough to face me?
*The lights go out and the Goldberg theme hits. The crowd is NUTS and starts chanting Goldberg. Little flares go up as the lights come back on. Its GILLBERG?!? The crowd roars with laughter as he walks to the ring, making all these mannerisms like Goldberg. He heads to the ring and climbs in, tripping on the ropes. He swipes the mic from Legend, whos trying not to laugh*
GILLBERG: I just have one question for you Legend WHOS FIRST?!?
*Gillberg growls wussily and Legend grabs the mic*
LEGEND: (in between laughter) You want it, you got it!
*Bell rings, match is underway*
==========
[Legends Match]:
Gillberg pinned Joe E. Legend with the Jackhammer in 0:09:15.
Rating: -* 3/4
OBSERVATIONS: Legend basically had the advantage the whole time, but Gillberg all of a sudden popped out of nowhere with a weak spear followed by a Jackhammer for the UPSET VICTORY!
==========
*Gillberg rolls out of the ring and celebrates! Legend grabs a mic*
LEGEND: No, no, no, no, no! Gillberg, you lucky son of a bitch! You didnt beat me fair and square! You grabbed my tights! I want you on Superstars Gillberg in a rematch!
*Gillberg growls and yells you got it! as the crowd cheers*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*We see a rundown of the past few weeks and the Caden-Hylander feud*
==========
Caden pinned Jesse James Armstrong after a Frankensteiner from the top rope in
0:09:24.
Rating: **
OBSERVATIONS: This match was at the request of Armstrong, who was still pissed he was screwed out of his shot of the Southern Title on the first Havoc a week back. Armstrong took it to Caden and managed to hit the Pumphandle Slam but Caden got his foot on the ropes ensuring the match would go on. Armstrong was felled minutes later by a Frankensteiner off the top rope.
==========
*After the match, Caden hit a Cadenizer to an already hurt Armstrong. Caden then grabbed a mic*
CADEN: Hylander, I stay we stop all these petty going around. At Beach Blast, I want your ass in the ring! *crowd cheers* Lets hope you accept Hylander unless Alicia wont let you.
*Caden throws the mic down and walks off*
==========
*Backstage, Evan Hylander is in his locker room. He kicks the TV, which crashes to the ground*
HYLANDER: That son of a bitch wants me at Beach Blast hell have me! His ass is mine!
==========
Commercial Break
==========
The Quebecers defeated The Harris Brothers when P. Oulette pinned R. Harris
with the Cannonball in 0:13:53.
Rating: * 3/4
(The Quebecers won the USWA Tag Team Titles.)
OBSERVATIONS: Quite an interesting match. Both teams went back and forth. In the final minutes, Men on a Mission came out to try to stop The Quebecers from winning. But Mabel accidentally hit Ron Harris with a chair. Jacques kept Don Harris busy as Pierre ended up winning the match for his team as well as the belts!
==========
*The Quebecers quickly celebrate their win then high tail it out of there as Mabel and Mo rush in. Ron and Don Harris then attack Men on a Mission from behind, leaving them laying*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
*Backstage, we have Joe Bob Briggs with The Gambler, whos still decked out on his designer threads*
BRIGGS: *trying to hold in sarcasm* Gambler, tonight you will go one on one with Triple H for the Heavyweight Title. This is a big night and it looked like your dressed for the occasion GOD YOU LOOK TERRIBLE!
GAMBLER: Hey man, these clothes cost me 500 bucks! I made a couple bets on Superstars and won a bunch so I decided to look good tonight. It is a big night. But whatever. As I proved to everyone by beating my good friend Vader, I am better than I seem. And tonight I will destroy Triple H. Let the dice roll baby! *Pause* New catchphrase. What do you think?
BRIGGS: No wonder no one else signed up for this job.
*Briggs walks off*
GAMBLER: What?!? It goes with the gimmick!
==========
Evan Hylander defeated Malice by disqualification in 0:12:38.
Rating: 3/4*
(Evan Hylander retained the USWA Southern Title.)
OBSERVATIONS: This is a debut of Malice and he took it to Hylander. But Caden came in to interfere and cause the DQ.
==========
*After the match, Caden continued the assault. But Hylander started to fight back. The two fought into the crowd before being separated by security*
==========
Commercial Break
==========
The Gambler pinned Hunter Hearst Helmsley with the Five Card Stud in 0:09:28.
Rating: *
(The Gambler retained the USWA Heavyweight Title.)
OBSERVATIONS: This match was insane! Triple H wasted no time getting on the offensive, jumping The Gambler even before the bell rang. The fight spilled to the outside, back into the ring, then back to the outside with Trips getting more offense than Gambler. Gambler started to fight back though and managed to hit a dropkick that sent Trips from the apron to the barricade. King Kong Bundy came out and tried to attack but Gambler managed to fight him off for awhile. Trips then hit the ref and the two went nuts on him. Trips then hit the Pedigree. The ref woke up. 1..2..GAMBLER KICKED OUT! Trips threw Gambler into the ref again and Bundy came back out. But this time, Gambler had backup. Big Van Vader ran to the ring and knocked Bundy to the outside unconscious. Vader then hit a DEVESTATING chair shot to Trips cranium. Gambler woke up and hit the Five Card Stud. 1...2...3! GAMBLER WON IT!
==========
*Vader pulls Gambler out of the ring and the two celebrate from the ramp as the show goes off the air. Triple H and Bundy stood there in awe and anger*
==========
©2003 Dogstar Productions
